Me: Roll over.
GM: The hedgehog rolls over. It’s adorable.
GM: You take a few steps away. The hedgehog remains where it is.
GM: The hedgehog heals you for 5 HP.
Me: Holy shit.
- Chocolate: Raw nuts/seeds.
- Oily/Fatty Snacks: Kale, leafy greens.
- Soda/Carbonated Drinks: Actual, literal bubbles.
- Chips/Salty Food: Topsoil.
- Cookies: Freudian psychology.
- Sweet Tea: A strong Southern gentleman to take care of you.
- Pasta/Carbs: Pasta/Carbs.
- Ice: The sweet release of death.
i like to think that hogwarts has a really strong wi-fi signal, but like the stair cases, it keeps moving around. just muggleborns, chillin on their laptops all suddenly stand up together, dash madly to a different corner of the school, and sit down wordlessly like some kind of mind hive flock of pigeons while the purebloods are just so confused
- 12-year-old girl: I don't want kids when I grow up.
- Society: You'll change your mind when you get older. You're only 12. You're too young to know what you want.
- 16-year-old girl: I'm pregnant.
- Society: How could you be so stupid? Do you know anything about safe sex? You should be ashamed.
- 20-year-old woman: I'm a single mother with an infant son.
- Society: You should've gone to college first. You need a stable career before you can support a child.
- 33-year-old woman: I'm married and my spouse and I both have stable careers. I have two young daughters now.
- Society: You're not staying home? Who's going to take care of them? You're just going to put them in day care while you work? That's selfish of you. You can't expect to raise decent kids with a full-time job.
- 45-year-old woman: I just had my first child.
- Society: Why would you have a child when you're that old? Do you realize the health risks of being pregnant at your age? When your kid is a teenager you'll be a senior citizen. That's inconsiderate of you.
- 60-year-old woman: I haven't had any children.
- Society: Your life must be so unfulfilling. Is there something wrong with you? Why didn't you want kids? How strange.
ISTJ: Practical and down-to-earth. Probably your mother.
ISFJ: Always nice enough to be suspicious and more loyal than all your pets combined.
ISTP: Probably don’t care about you, might still kill you in your sleep though.
ISFP: Always carrying at least 4 daisy chains on them at all times; don’t take them to museums if you ever want to come out again.
INTP: That one guy hiding in their room trying to calculate exactly how much bigger the TARDIS is on the inside.
INFP: Starry-eyed idealist, so caring and sweet they might just rot your teeth out.
INTJ: 50% standoffishness, 50% being right all the time, 100% better than you.
INFJ: Spends half their time delivering melodramatic heroic monologues and the other half attempting to purify the ground they walk on.
ESTJ: 100% committed to their life partner, the rulebook.
ESFJ: Happy to make you happy to make them—could potentially create a feeling paradox.
ESTP: Probably Kanye West.
ESFP: The golden retriever you always wanted, except in human form.
ENTP: Would probably blow up the world to calculate shrapnel velocity.
ENFP: Like a bottle of fizzy soda, except with more righteousness.
ENTJ: Like an INTJ, just better at hiding the fact that they’re an asshole.
ENFJ: The world’s mother hen. May also be running ten cults of worship behind your back.
We have been called “a lost generation…[not] giving birth to anything new” and “too quiet, too online.” In fact the opposite is true. There is a deafening roar in cyberspace. If a presidential election can be won through the support of an online movement, if articles and ideas can reach tens of millions of people overnight, and create a four-thousand person discussion, if YouTube can receive 200,000 new videos a day, then being “too quiet” and “too online” is the opinion of someone who doesn’t understand what it means to be online. Not creating anything new and not being loud enough are not our problems. So why the disrespect from the famous 60s generation? Because we aren’t doing what they want us to do.
Most of us were born after the end of the Cold War or were too young to remember it. The political climate we grew up in was one of supreme hypocrisy. One President nearly got impeached for a superficial sex scandal and then another later broke international laws to preemptively start a war without UN support and was re-elected to serve 2 full terms without so much as a breath of legal retribution.
The problem my generation faces is inheriting a world that baffles us: a world of hypocrisy and crisis; a world on the brink of collapse yet at the height of human civilization.
Imagine for a moment being one of us. Taught in school that all people are created equal, that all countries are sovereign, that freedom, democracy, and capitalism are embraced by all people and nations because they are ultimate ideals that allow us to prosper and live as we choose in the pursuit of happiness. Old enough to read the New York Times online and blog on Huffington Post, we see a very different world. Equality? Not for the poor, not for LGBT. Capitalism? It appears to have been a house of cards recklessly constructed by greed for the benefit of a few. Sovereignty? Not for resource-poor or oil-rich countries. Ideals? Not for the media or our political and business leaders.
Now we must navigate a world where a concentration of power, wealth, and media often conflicts with every ideal the Western world is supposed to stand for. If you think we are too quiet and too online you should consider that we have two choices. One, to accept the values we were taught to believe in and totally redefine and reconstruct the way our government/economy/society works so that these ideals match reality. Or two, to accept the world we live in and think up a new set of values to justify our lives."
— Your Generation of Hypocrisy Begat My Apathetic(?!) One. - Cameron Russell, 2009. (via particlecollisions)